“You can control what you think and how you think, and therefore you can control who you are.”
— Eileen Gu, Chinese-American freestyle skier, 22
I have something I need to say out loud.
I’ve been stuck in neutral since July 2025. Literally stuck.
I’m fine. In fact, most days I’m annoyingly happy. But a major life change happened last summer, and I haven’t been able to move forward since. It’s difficult to explain, but as my writing coach, Alice, once told me: Try.
Okay, Alice.
I stalled out.
I stopped being creative.
I stopped traveling and discovering.
I stopped reading, learning and growing.
Worst of all, I stopped loving myself.
For months, I’ve been waking up, taking care of what had to be taken care of, maybe watched a game, and gone back to sleep. Rinse. Repeat. No edge. No intention.
And the calendar kept flipping.
It must have shown. Four different friends — at four different times — called or texted the same question: “Hey… are you okay?”
No. I’m not. And it’s my fault.
And it took a 22-year-old Olympic skier to wake me up.
Eileen Gu was asked by a reporter what makes her tick — how her brain works. Her answers are always so intentional, so thoughtful, so mature.
Her response was pure gold:
“I’m in my head a lot,” she began. It’s so interesting, I get to become — every day — the kind of person that me at age eight would revere. How empowering is that? You can control what you think about, and you literally get to choose who you want to be.”
And then she had the nerve to add:
“If I was eight, I would be obsessed with me. I would love me!” She said it with confidence. With a smile. She didn’t flinch at how it might sound. She didn’t worry about being labeled arrogant or boastful. It was as if she was saying: Think whatever you want. This is who I’m choosing to be.
She’s a badass: I used to be a badass.
I played the reel over and over again. For me, it wasn’t just an inspirational soundbite. It felt like a quiet rebuke.
Curt, what have you been doing since last summer?
How have you spent your time?
What have you been thinking about?
Maybe I needed to rest. I definitely needed to grieve something that was lost. Maybe neutral was protection for a while. But it was never meant to last.
Here’s the honest part: I don’t know exactly what’s next.
I don’t have a five-step plan. I’m not making any dramatic announcements.
I just know this — life is shorter than we like to think. Days fly past like you’re watching a time lapse. Suddenly, you look up, and you realize you’ve been coasting.
I don’t want to coast anymore.
The next few weeks are going to be interesting. Because I’ve decided — with a nudge from an impressive young Olympic winner — that you’re never too old to listen, learn, and take action.
